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Very silly of me perhaps but since I became a k.d. fan last Feb, I more or less' followed ' her. I mean, it was easy to know where she was performing, etc. And I miss this, while being happy for her that she is recuperating away from the spotlight after all these months of travelling and giving her best every night or so. I have ambiguous feelings about us fans and our relationship to her and vice-versa. The more I read about the crazy years of k.d mania, the more ( thank you Soozie for all those articles on the period) I feel I (we?) must be careful not to overdo it and above all let her know that it is the artist, the singer we admire and love mostly. I think that while recognizing and being proud perhaps of what she represents to some of us, in that respect she has given much more than she was really willing to, being caught in a whirlwind that she was too sincere and generous to wave off. Until she realized that it was beginning to destroy her...
Of course I would have liked to be a fan at that time and how I envy those of you who were... That k.d. is still giving concerts and autographs (however grudgingly sometimes maybe, is more than I can wish for. You will reason that it is part of her job to do these things and that she knows it very well and you are right. However, I cannot but admire the way she manages it all, the balance between being a star and filling venues with all that this entails and the determination not to let that aspect of her life/personality take the better of her or even destroy her. Because her sincerity and generosity on stage and in life would have made her the perfect candidate to end up like Elvis maybe, although in an altogether different way. In spite of her obvious sensitivity, she is very also very strong and determined. Too bad that some of these very good genes were not passed on to a future generation. But that is an altogether different story...
Much love to you all,
Chantal